burn out

singing is supposed to be fun, out of the blue i'll even sing a line of my own

but not when i'm obliged when singing's involved

it's been one terrible week of no study: to record basic guitar n keyboard parts, singing the same whole song twice in low and high octave respectively, tedious sound editing cos i make heckofalotofmistakes, working with two freeware sound editors (opening one, blabla, exiting that one, open the other, blablabla, exiting, opening back..) cos one has the feature which the other doesn't

typing out #T%T! minutes for final handover (dam my English)

recording songs, copy n paste lyrics, re-read the lyrics, adding in my own notes as to when the solo comes in n how long the solos are to familiarise the songs for another event only to find out 3 of the 11 songs i've selected couldn't be played cos my songlist email wasn't read. So had to repeat the whole process, emailed the lyrics for one. And on that day itself that i fell sick, i really didn't receive any email of the final songlist and sang about half of the songs that was practiced, was given a bad mic which no one could hear me until almost the end of the performance..and i felt totally low at the presence of someone so well-dressed, so charismatic, so confident, so comfortable on-stage - but it was a blast that i did backup vocals with someone so great

but really...drained out..i dun think i wanna touch another mic for some time..can't even bring myself to sing English songs..not even learning any Japanese songs..listening to anime songs okay..but not to learn the lyrics..just listen..

no, dun try to push me to another perspective. i can't go on - the stress i still can feel as if it's last week - i'm really stressed out until i can burst

again back to the issue - having a bf would help me now