なぜだ..

i'm always either one step back behind or one step forward of someone, never in the same pace, never totally in step with anyone. i feel so lack when i'm behind of someone, so empty when i'm "in front" of someone. My sentences have ended up trailing off without proper ending - who's listening, i keep telling myself. It seems like i cannot talk like i used to

i duno a lot of things, i find myself having to stay silent and listen, i duno how to contribute. is there a problem wif me "being there"?

it's bcos there's a problem wif me "being there" so i'm forced to segregate, i hate it but i have no choice

everyone wants to feel belonged in a group, why ask me why? wat's wrong wif seeking acceptance? wat's wrong wif seeking approval? do i have to be segregated forever? do i have to be "solo" forever?

today i'm pulled at again..i find nothing for tnite, i feel like i'm going through the motions tnite..

Won't you pat me on the head?

at least tomorrow would be better, dat's wat i hope for